The 10 Biggest Surprises of Orange Is The New Black

The 10 Biggest Surprises of Orange Is The New Black

Orange Is The New Black’s season 2 is here and it has a lot of surprises.

Please note: The following contains spoilers for Season 2 of Orange Is The New Black. If you have not yet seen it, WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? Seriously, go watch it now and then come back here to comment.

1. Lorna Morello is a stalker.

I always thought Morello was a little obsessed about her Christopher, but I was shocked when we finally see her back story, which deliberately starts to make us think that she got caught for mail fraud (since she was running a scam by ordering expensive items and then calling the company to say they never arrived and asking for a credit card refund). But no, Morello was busted for stalking… Christopher! In fact, the two went on one date and then she got all creepy-like.

Yes, Morello has been lying this entire time. But she’s not really lying, because she really wants to believe that she and Christopher are in love and engaged, but she’s forced to face reality when she finds out that he’s really getting married – to the girlfriend that Morello tried to car-bomb once.

Just whoa.

2. Vee is ruthless.

At first, Vee seems like a nice, motherly (albeit criminal) mother figure to a young Tastee. But as the series progress, we start to see that this woman is seriously unraveled and is actually a psychopath. However, I was still shocked when she attacks Red. That was some seriously cray-cray behavior. So her come-uppance in the last moments of the final episode felt right.

3. Rosa was and still is a bad-ass.

We finally get to see Rosa’s back story and it’s much more exciting than we could have imagined. She was a bank robber, addicted to the scent of money. But even better? She was a sort of inadvertent black widow, because her lovers often got killed during said bank robberies. Rosa, though? She just moved on to the next man. That makes it even more difficult to find out that the cancer is winning now, but those final moments of her freedom when she takes the van and goes all Thelma & Louise are priceless. Plus, she runs over Vee, because “she was rude.” Rock on with your bad self, Rosa.

4. Poussey was a military brat.

Poussey carries herself like a thug, but it turns out that she’s a military brat, who, at some point, got fed up of moving all the time. She has issues with attachments because of that. It’s nice to see her background and be surprised by where she came from. It also explains why she’s developed a thing for Tastee.

5. Larry and Polly hook up.

So who saw Larry and Polly hooking up? I mean, how screwed up is that for Piper? I’m not even really a big Larry fan, but wow… Piper’s best friend? Really? I’m still not sure how that happened. But I am really happy with the way Red told her to stop crying and to start plotting her revenge. And I’m happy that Piper did exactly that, in the most immature and juvenile way possible.

6. Pennsatucky has feelings.

Okay, I was surprised that Pennsatucky finally got new teeth, but also surprised by her behavior change this season. It seems being locked up in solitary did wonders for her attitude. She’s even started to share her feelings and is part of Healey’s new “Safe Place” therapy group. And she genuinely seems to want to be a better person.

7. Mendez’ Returns.

Okay, bringing someone who basically raped a prisoner back into the prison didn’t seem realistic, but I have to admit that he was still a breath of fresh air when he stepped back into the prison. I almost cheered. I was disappointed that he didn’t last long, but I think we haven’t seen the last of Mendez. Even more priceless? The ladies’ faces when they saw him again.

8. Caputo is the good guy.

Who saw this coming? Caputo wasn’t always an all-out bad guy, but he was Fig’s second-in-command, so he was the enemy by association. I didn’t think he’d step up the way he did this season to take down Fig. But the way she went down was amazingly crazy. I’ll admit I cheered when she gave him a blow job thinking she was saving her own butt and he told her afterwards that he’d already given the reports with proof of her embezzlement to the warden. S-N-A-P. And to top everything off, he’s in a band called Side Boob.

9. Fig is Human.

Although she is a despicable human being who was embezzling money from the prison and making conditions their much worse, it turns out that she leads a very human life. It seems it was her husband’s idea to steal the money because he’s running for political office and needed the funds. But even worse? Her husband is cheating on her… with another man. Yes, Fig is human, but she’s still a horrible example of one.

10. Black Cindy was a TSA agent.

Okay, given what we know about the TSA, this probably shouldn’t be a surprise, but Black Cindy worked for the TSA and often went through people’s luggage and stole their iPads. But she also has a daughter who lives with Cindy’s mother, with the daughter thinking that Cindy is her sister. So yeah, here’s another inmate with yet another extremely screwed-up story. But isn’t that what this show is about.

So what do you think? What surprises hit you the most during this new season of Orange Is The New Black? Leave me a comment and let me know.

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